Oh dreams...

Normally I don't remember my dreams. But when I do, they are usually really really weird and pointless. But last night I had the weirdest and most real dream that I have ever had. Of course it took place at work (because that's all I have been doing lately) and involved one of my favorite co-workers and one of my favorite people in the whole world. It was not happy though. I woke up and once I finally realized that it was a dream, the same feelings in my dream haven't gone away. It wasn't like love or anything, just like sadness... I don't really want to tell it...
It literally is like sticking with me and I can't seem to shake it off. The feelings seem real, like it totally could have happened. I don't even know how to explain it all, but it really freaked me out more than any nightmare I've ever had. Ugh. Dreams can really be amazing and awesome. But they can also really suck. :P

2 more days...

I have 2 more days until my whole life is changed forever!!! I will be getting my call on Wednesday... I have very mixed emotions. I know I'm going to ball. I know that no matter where I get called it will be where I am meant to go. People have been asking me where I want to go. My first answer- I really don't care! Then they ask, "No. If you could go anywhere!"My second answer- Australia, Italy, France.  Then they ask, "Ok where do you not want to go?" My first answer- I will still go anywhere! I wouldn't even be disappointed if I went to Salt Lake!
Well fellas... I'm here to tell you that is only partially true. I have a strong testimony that where ever I am called it is where I am meant to go. But I also know me... I know that when I open my call and if I see Utah, Idaho, or Arizona I might be slightly disappointed... and that's just me being honest. I have no idea why that would upset me... it's not like I would start crying because I was so sad, I would probably still cry because I knew that is where I am supposed to be...and I would be so happy. It isn't about me, it's about the people that need the gospel and I am just an instrument in His hands. This is no vacation... but I would also like to be a little farther away from home than that. And I know that it would be good for me.
But- clarifying again, I know that I will go where I am supposed to go! Even if it is Provo Utah! :)

Also- I have had 2 different dreams about where I am going to go.
The first one was Saturday night- I had a dream I was going somewhere... I don't remember where because even in my dream I didn't know. People would ask me where I was going and I would say I don't remember and they would be so confused... but wherever I was going I was speaking "WAVES" as a language... hey guess what guys... that is NOT a language... weird dream.

The second dream- This one was last night (Sunday) I had a dream I was going to a place in South America that started with an F (hey guess what guys... this does not exist either). It was the poorest place in the world...

These super weird dreams probably mean nothing... but they are pretty hilarious!

Patience... Patience... PATIENCE!!!

OK. I cannot take it anymore! I just want to have my call! Ya.... sure... my papers aren't even in yet, but it's hard being patient for my doctors appointment (Wednesday) my dentist appointment (Wednesday) and meeting with my Stake President (still to be determined). My bishop told me to get my papers in as soon as I can. Just so I can try and beat the huge wave. I got everything filled out the night I met with him. I scheduled the dentist the next day, and I already had the doctors scheduled. The stake president is going to be the death of me. I seriously cannot wait. I have had this impatience disease my whole life. It's a cure. I dunno how I got it. My mom or dad don't have it... when I get married I might actually pass away from it. AHHHHH!! I can't stop thinking about it. Plus I know that even after I get my papers in it will take forever because all of the people putting them in. But the sooner I get them in, the better. I'm trying to stay positive... It's so hard!!! The stake president it out of town next week and I don't think I can wait another week. But he told me to be patient, and I know that I can do it... I just keep praying for Heavenly Father to keep me patient... the sad thing is... it's working. I dunno what I would do if I hadn't prayed for it. I wouldn't be able to handle it. 

Ya this is kind of super pathetic (more than you know actually) that this is my troubles right now. People are out there dying and I'm complaining about waiting for the greatest thing that is going to happen to me in my life. Sorry. That's pretty selfish. I'm just so excited. I've been waiting forever to go on a mission, I should be able to control myself and wait just a little bit longer. 

Thanks for listening. ;) 

This has to be a dream...

I had one of the happiest days of my life yesterday. I always think something exciting will be announced in conference like everyone gets free ice cream or something (ya no... I don't really know what would be exciting, but I always hope there is something like that). Or maybe something scary like we have to start polygamy again. All I know about those things is that whatever President Monson tells us to do, I will do it without question and without hesitation.
The announcement that the age of going on a mission has been lowered literally changed my life in a blink of an eye.
As President Monson was talking about the boys and changed the age I immediately hoped he would change the girls as well. I waited in anticipation... I thought he would just change it to 20 because he had only put the boys down one year. When I heard him say 19 I thought I was in a dream. I didn't know whether to cry or scream in excitement. In reality- I was so incredibly happy and in shock that I didn't know what to do. I felt like my insides were going to burst. I couldn't even cry because of it. But believe me- that came later. I can't say that I can think of a happier I have felt in my life. Or at least it's in the top 5 times when I have felt the most happiness in my life.
I was with my roommates at the time he announced it, and I have to admit- I don't remember a lot of the rest of the first session. My excitement was really getting to me. I went to work a little bit before the first session was over in complete happiness. I had a 10 hour and 45 minute shift ahead of me... I didn't care a bit. The only reason I didn't want to go was because I wanted to call and cry to my mom. I waited in anticipation all day just to be able to talk to my mom. All the cashiers would talk to me about it. Even the customers would. People were just thrilled about the news! I even got quite a few texts and facebook messages of people telling me that I was the first person they thought of when they heard the announcement. I can't tell you how much that means to me!
Finally I got off, but my family went to bed before I got home so I couldn't talk to them about it.
Instead I got to talk to Austin about it and then Zach. But on my car ride home I couldn't help but pour out my heart in gratitude and happiness to my Father in Heaven. I couldn't even control myself. I can't even explain the moment in words. I felt so close to my Father in Heaven and knew that He was there listening to every single word I was saying. This was an answer to my prayers that I did not expect. It just goes to show that we have no idea what is in store for us and Heavenly Father has a plan for us and it will not always follow what we want. I'm just lucky this time it was exactly what I wanted, just not at all what I expected.
I had been praying to find myself and know what I needed to be doing in my life because what I was doing just wasn't working. Sure I was going to school, working, making friends, reading my scriptures, going to church, all of that. It just felt like something was missing. I kept saying that to my family and friends. I just thought that I was missing a boyfriend/husband or something. Mainly because that is what I wanted so badly. But I was already planning on going on a mission. This just means I get to go earlier and it will be a little easier to have a plan for my life. I am going to drop everything and go. I will finish this semester at school and go when and where I get called. I cannot even wait. And I haven't even turned in my papers yet! This is going to be an agonizing next couple of months just waiting. But I know I can do it! At least I will have school occupying my thoughts to help!
I told my mom after the first session of Sunday conference. I had already texted her and my whole family basically knew me, and knew that I would be going. But I hadn't actually told her. Plus, I wanted to make sure that it was the right thing, and that I wasn't just too excited about it to not listen to the spirit. I fasted that morning. After conference was done I just knew I was supposed to go. I looked at her and said, "Mom, I'm going. I'm going on a mission." Then I just started balling. I told her my testimony and said that I knew President Monson was an instrument in God's hand because I had been praying for it. She hugged me and we cried together. It was definitely a moment I will cherish and never forget.

I just know without a single doubt in my mind that Heavenly Father knows our needs, wants, and he knows what is best for our church. I know President Monson is called of God and receives revelation through him. This is going to be a huge change in our church, but I know it will be for the better. And I can't wait to start serving people in need of the gospel for a year and a half of my life! I can't wait to have another experience like I did with Jackie. I can already see the impact that her having the gospel in her life has done. 2 of her friends are getting baptized now because of her. Because of course, this isn't for me, it's for the wonderful people that are ready to hear the gospel and I can't wait to be an instrument in my Heavenly Father's hand to find and teach them! :)

Dear Future Jacket...

I really like this whole jacket thing. Even tonight at FHE we talked about what characteristics we would want in our future jacket.
(let me get those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about caught up. Elder Oaks gave a talk in regional stake conference and used a hilarious analogy comparing boyfriends/girlfriends/spouses to jackets. It was hilarious, and totally true. He talked about how you are in this club and everyone seems to have a jacket and you don't and you can't just seem to find one. Everyone is talking about how nice their jacket is and just all about the jacket and you have no clue where yours is.) I do not have a jacket, so I thought that I'd write a funny letter to my future one... (coming up with an analogy for a jacket and person is not that easy).

So here is my incredibly cheesy letter to my future jacket :)

Dear Future Jacket,
Let's start with the basics. You will need to always keep me extremely warm. I don't want you to think it's only temporary. I will need you 24/7 (even in the summer) I don't care if I'm scourging hot, I would still like you to keep me as warm as possible. I would love you to be warm and fuzzy, even if you are afraid to show it. ;) A good jacket should keep you safe. A good jacket needs to have essentials in the pockets. A good jacket just knows when you are cold and knows exactly how to warm you right up. I don't want a lazy, torn, used, or smelly jacket. But remember- you can be washed. I want a jacket who knows what it needs to do and how to do it. Jackets must know where they were made and know how to get back. Ya, sometimes there are holes in jackets, but together, we can mend them. Sometimes my friends or family might not like you- but just know, I have a special place for you in my closet :) You need to be really soft so I can snuggle reallllll good. Keeping my hands warm is a must. You don't need to be fancy, expensive, or even a certain style. All I ask is that you fit just right. If you do all of these things I will keep you forever and never ever throw you away. :)

<3 me :)

Weirdest Zac Effron Dream Ever...

This dream is probably the weirdest one I have had. I just couldn't help but write it down...
So I was at this play, I think it was a high school play. A bunch of drama kids from high school were there including Christina and Amanda. They were practicing, but for some reason they didn't have a piano player, so I started just playing for them while they were practicing for the play. Then the crazy drama lady like the director or something told me I should play for the play. So, I did.
But while we were practicing right before the play was supposed to start we had this idea that for one of the scenes we would do our hair super crazy. We REALLY REALLY wanted to do it, but the director wouldn't have it. I got so mad for some dumb reason that she wouldn't let us do our hair all crazy, so I left and told her I wouldn't play the piano (this was right before the play was supposed to start). I gathered all my things (which for some reason, was all my laundry) and left. But before I left, as I was picking up my stuff, I looked out the window to the stage (don't ask me why there was one) but then I saw Zac Effron all dressed up.... like on the stage.... at a High School play. I thought it was weird. So then I tried calling my mom to come and pick me up. I couldn't get a hold of her so I just drove home (I know, it makes no sense... but it's a dream so....).
As I was driving home I was feeling stupid about not talking to Zac Effron when I had the choice. So I went back and then all of the sudden we were in his huge nice motor home...
So me and someone else... I think it was Christina... we were talking to him, I was totally flirting, and like cuddling with him and he was doing the same back...... it was so weird.... but awesome of course. Then I decided since we were parked right next to Zach's house (Wilson) we would talk to Austin (I don't get it either). So we reached over from the window and Zac Effron called out Austin! Austin! Austin and Jake came over. They were so surprised. So then we all hung out together for a while talking. Zac lived alone in the motor home going around to all kinds of shows. He kept talking about how he was going to get paid for the show he was just in at around 10:00 that night. I was wondering why he was worried about it because he was rich. He said he didn't like it cuz he got bored at lot. He had seen ever since movie ever made... odd. I looked into his room and he had the LDS movies all stacked up on this shelf....
Then we decided to invite him to Andrew's house. His family loved him, but he was bombarded by so many people and we all started acting like crazy people around him. We even started calling him Troy at one point because he was looking down and not answering to Zac. We thought it was the funniest thing ever. But we made him super uncomfortable will all the people. Plus, we were playing this weird video game where Bowser was on this balloon bike riding on top of a rope...
I think that was it... super weird dream!

Here's a look at what I saw... (yes, he is in my top 5. I sure hope this is not what my roommate heard me talking about when I was sleep talking... crap...