Having trust in Him.

I love playing the piano. I don't know if you knew that, but really that's because I have no idea who reads this... but I can play most of the hymns (known hymns.. not like I'm a Pilgram I'm a Stranger) and if I haven't played it before,  I usually don't have a hard time playing it (Exception- True to the Faith)
I have been playing the piano for about 10 years. I know, that sounds like a long time. You would think I would be this really good piano player. Well, I'm not. It's not my talent or skill even a little bit. I do not come from an extremely musically talented family... I have had to work like a crazy person (I usually sit and play the piano for about 30min-1 hour a day) just to be able to play the hymns. The thing I hate about it, I can only sight read. I have no musical ability whatsoever; so sitting and making up a song will never happen. I can't even hear it or pick something out... I can only read the music. Which has been a very good thing for me, and I'm so grateful that Heavenly Father has given me the ability to do it.
Ok. Enough on that.
I was thinking about it the other day... I am probably going to lose a lot of my piano playing ability on my mission. We won't have a piano (obviously) and I will probably never have to opportunity to go to a church on my p-day to practice for a while. Besides that, how much do you think my companion would like that?
So it was kind of bumming me out. But then I remembered a conversation with a costumer at Costco that I had a while back. She was telling me about how her granddaughter wanted to serve a mission, but was an amazing gymnast. She was afraid that she would lose everything if she went on a mission for a year and a half. The grandma then told me that she explained to her that if she had faith, did what Heavenly Father wanted her to do, and trusted in him, that it would all work out for the best. The best meaning that she could come back and pick up where she left off. Or come back and be even better than she was before. Or maybe come back and not be able to do it anymore, but find a different path to go on.
When I remembered that I was soooooo happy. That little dumb fear of losing my piano playing abilities was completely gone. I know that what I am doing is exactly what my Heavenly Father wants me to be doing. And that's all that matters. If we follow him and do what he asks, everything else will work out the way that it is supposed to. :)

NO. It really hasn't been that long.

I really do feel like I haven't blogged in FOREVER! But guys, looking back, it's really only been... a week and a half... crap. My days are going by slow again. Whhhhhyyy!? 66 days. But it still feels like an eternity. I feel really awful complaining about it, because some people do not even get to go on missions... I am so grateful for this amazing opportunity. And I never want to be ungrateful or take it for granted (wait... that word. Weird...) because I feel so privileged to be able to go serve the Lord. I keep saying the same thing over and over again. My life is in repeat mode right now. Working so much is getting to me. People are still surprised about when I am going. I know someone who got their call this past week and are leaving March 13th. It's rough. But I KNOW THERE IS A REASON (if I keep saying it maybe it will finally stick).
Here are some fun pictures to look at since this was a pretty boring post.

Coming home from the Provo temple after we went through with Riley to get his own endowments. :) 

What we do on Saturday mornings when we are bored. 

Super crooked. I was walking...

The other fun things we do on Saturday morning....

They were actually pretty chill for being old grandmas being pulled around.

The poem we wrote in sacrament meeting... lovely. At least it gets to the point of church on the last line right?  

Unagi

*WARNING- boring, blabbing alert...

I am so writing about this again. I am in the state of Unagi again.

My life is just complete bliss right now.
I can't tell you how happy I am every day. I love my life and everything about it!
I love my family.
I love my calling.
I love my friends.
I love my job...............
I love the gospel.
I love church.
I love... everything really!

My mission is only 87 days away and in a weird way, it actually feels like it's getting close!
My mom is now sort of off her crazy work schedule and we can start preparing a little more.
Sister Arnold gave a fabulous testimony today in church about priorities that I really needed. Now that I am "officially off break" I need to start doing productive things with my day; especially because I am leaving for a mission soon, and I don't have a ton to do (at least that's what it feels like) because I am not going to school. I still have work to occupy a little bit of my time, but I still have a lot more to do to prepare. But so far- everything is going smoothly.
They say you can feel Satan working overtime on you the second you have your mission call. I think he has been slamming me since I made the actual firm choice that I was going to serve a mission. But lately, it's been harder than ever. And like I have kind of mentioned, it's not even really with "bad sins" but more like time wasters and selfish acts. But I have the determination and faith that if I am preparing how I should, and doing what I should, my Heavenly Father will help me to overcome the power of Satan. The temple has been a great strength for me. I feel at home, and at peace. I can talk to my Heavenly Father on a deeper, more personal level, and feel his endless love for me. Even just surrounding myself with people that are kind of on the same boat has helped. Today we had a temple prep class after church for the people who are soon to be leaving on their missions or turning in their papers. Being around these young men strengthens me and makes me even more excited to be on my mission and be able to interact with so many wonderful people. I can't even express to you how happy and anxious all of this makes me feel! :)

I love my new Primary kids!

I seriously do! They are 2 years younger.... well... kind of. They are 4 turning 5. I had the 5 turning 6. Two of them are siblings of 2 girls in my older class. They are just a blast. Their sweet spirits make me want to be better and I can't stop smiling around them! They were so good in Primary I didn't even know what to do... seriously. I was astonished. Then in class I actually got through the whole lesson without a problem! I even dragged it out longer and they loved it! I gave them ring pops and they just surrounded me talking the whole time. They told me stories, asked me questions, and we all just laughed. I am going to miss my other crazy heads (even when they scream my name when I walk into Primary), but I can't wait to have a new class to learn from! :) 

2013 Goals

Everyone is making goals and I thought that it would be weird if I made goals because I am going my mission in 89 days (yep, I'm still counting down). But I decided that even though I am going on a mission I can still make a keep at least a few goals :)

1. Exercise at least 5 times a week. (I will be already doing this and more on my mission, so I might as well start now!)

2. Attend the temple at least once a week (I am hoping to go twice a week, but I feel like one is reasonable, then I don't have to feel like a failure when I don't accomplish it)

3. Say my morning prayers.

4. Be kind to others.

Oh! I made a goal in December not to get on Facebook at all and I TOTALLY accomplished it! I don't even like it anymore!

I just love my Primary kids!

Only two more Sunday's till my little friends move on to another class :'(
I have grown very attached to these kids! Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy trying to teach them, have fun, be their friend, and keep them quiet, but it has been worth every minute! I teach the gospel in simple ways and they always have questions that I can answer, and I know that is because I pray every Saturday night that I will be able to teach with the spirit and be able to teach them the things that they need to know. I really feel like a missionary when I teach them though! They have the cutest questions about heaven, Jesus, the scriptures, and even things like clothes, candy, and hair that don't even pertain to the lesson :)
They have defiantly taught me more than I could ever teach them. Their sweet spirits and testimonies shine through as they say prayers, give talks, help each other, and always listen close and talk nicely of Jesus. They love and know their Savior and have helped me realize how simple and sweet this gospel is. That is why we are supposed to become as a little child to enter into the kingdom of God. Matthew 18:1-5
Sometimes parents might think that they aren't doing a good enough job, but trust me, I can see it. You are :)


*I really wanted to share this hilarious story that got me laughing so hard in church that I was crying...

They really like to play hangman. A lot.
This is kind of how it goes- They stand on the table. They either whisper a word to me that they want to do, or they tell me to tell them a word. Then I tell them how many lines to draw. Then all the kids will start guessing words. Every round I have to remind them that they need to guess letters. Once they start guessing letters then sometimes I will have to tell them where that letter is on their lines. Believe it or not they are actually pretty good at guessing the words! Zach was helping me teach last week and they all guessed the words even before him! There are 4 words that get used EVERY SINGLE TIME: resurrection (I might have drilled that word into their heads one lesson. Now they all just want to use it), The Book of Mormon (because they think it's long and they know how to spell it), church (they know how to spell it... most of the time... this last time it didn't start with a C), and cat (that story is coming up).
So the last 2 times we have played it was James turn. He got up there and I asked him if he needed help. He says, "Nope! I've got a really good word!" Both of these times he has put up 3 lines. The first time it took a few tries for them to get the word CAT.
The next time we played, he did the same thing. The other kids got it a little faster.
Yesterday was the funniest thing ever, he gets up there and says, "I have one and it's going to fool everyone!" I mouth or whisper to Zach, "I promise it will be CAT." He laughs and then goes, "You're sure? Like, without a doubt?" I go, "he's done it every time. "I KNOW it will be."
James draws FOUR lines!
My jaw dropped and Zach just started laughing.
There was one kid who guessed like P or something.
James drew a head.
Then all in unison, almost every single kid goes, "CAT!"
James sighs and writes CAT....
Yes. I know what you are thinking... there were still 4 lines. But it still was CAT! So he didn't fool the other kids, but he sure did fool me and Zach!!!
We laughed and laughed for a long time. The other kids didn't get what was so funny... I just told James that was a very good word and I was proud of him for doing it on his own. He was still happy :)
But seriously.
If only you knew....

Spanish???

So I went to the temple for the second time with my cousin today. I had an amazing time and was able to learn a lot because it wasn't as nerve racking and I could actually pay attention. I still have SO much more to learn in the temple though! It's such an amazing place! I'm so glad that I get to go a lot before my mission. My goal is to go at least once a week, but more if I can! 

I've been having thoughts and impressions lately that I need to study/learn Spanish before I leave. At first I just put it off and thought that I was being crazy. But today in the temple, I just knew that I needed to. And from what we learn from President Monson is that we should NEVER IGNORE IMPRESSIONS/THE SPIRIT. I have no idea if I will even use it on my mission. I have just heard of so may missionaries getting called to Florida (Tampa even) Spanish speaking. I just want to be prepared. I don't want to miss an opportunity to teach and share my testimony of the gospel just because I don't know the language. Plus- I have heard that there are A LOT of people who speak Spanish who live in Florida. 

I know you probably think I'm crazy and that I'm not going to learn the language before April. But I trust in my Heavenly Father that if he asks/prompts/inspires me to do something, that with him I can accomplish it. No matter what. I have full faith that I will learn at least what I need to know, if I do all that I can, have faith, and trust and rely completely on our Heavenly Father. 

He knows exactly what we need. I know that he will lead and guide me to people that need to hear the gospel at this time. I know I say this at the end of every post like this- BUT I SERIOUSLY CANNOT EVEN WAIT!!!

Oh and I just wanted to thank my Sister Ashley and my friends Hailee, Jackie, and Kailey for helping me through these past couple of hard days when my mom hasn't really been avaliable. I couldn't do it without you guys! I love you!

Something BIG

So back in August we had our annual back to school blessings. My cousin Dustin came over for dinner and we had him give us our blessings. I love the amazing spirit that just fills the room when blessings are being given. I feel it is especially strong when my family receives blessings because we can all feel, every single time not only our Heavenly Father and Brother Jesus Christ in the room, but also our own father. This might sound a little weird to some people, but we can feel our own dad speaking to us through the blessing. We have had many times where the priesthood holder acting in God’s name actually says things that my dad wants us to know. The experience is always indescribable. In my blessing I was told that something very big would change in my life this year. I thought… oh crap… I’m gonna get married. Mainly because that was the only thing going through my mind at that time. It scared me a little.

I didn’t realize until a couple days ago that it was not talking about marriage... it was talking about my mission! I just know that Heavenly Father knows us, what we need, and knows what is in our future. This just shows that blessings are straight from our Father in Heaven and that inspiration is real, and I know that will all of my heart.

The second thing I wanted to talk about was my scripture reading. I just love the scriptures. Sometimes I can’t stop reading them! I know that sounds really cheesy, but sometimes I cannot stop reading them! I got so into the scriptures, Preach my Gospel, and Jesus the Christ that I was up till 2:00am the other night. But I have been noticing that I keep reading about the gift of tongues. That scares me! I said that I didn’t want to speak another language (not that this means that I'll speak another language). I just think I could do a lot better if I were to just say things that I want to in my own language… so people could actually understand me… although I do have a first testimony that Heavenly Father will send me where I need to go. That is for sure. Even if I have to speak Chinese… I’m go where I’m mean to go and where I can find the people that need to hear the gospel. 

19 days... I can do this.

19 days till I am done with this semester. Then I can just focus on my mission. Wow the days are going by slow. If I start thinking about my papers or my mission the world just switches to slow motion mode. It is literally killing me… and my grades. School hasn’t seemed to matter since the whole mission thing. Which is really bad. I’m still paying for this thing!

On Sunday our Primary had their program. My kids did SO good. They sang amazing and said their parts perfectly. Since they did so amazing we decided to write Elder Miller (their other teacher) some letters when we were in class. They are wrote the cutest and funniest things. I sent them to him along with another letter. I also got a letter back from him. I cannot believe how much he has changed already! I am so proud of him! Anyways. Just wanted to share the good news. J

I’ve just been preparing for my mission. All I want to do is study the Book of Mormon and Preach my Gospel. I have also decided to take on Jesus the Christ. My Stake President told me that if I read it before my mission it will bring me so many blessings. 

Oh ya...

MY PAPERS ARE IN!
The end.
I can't explain my excitement through this so I'm not even going to try... :)

Jazz Game!

I test drove a car about a month ago and I got Jazz tickets because I did! I'm really glad that I actually didn't buy the car though! I almost did. I was so close. But I know that my mom was listening to spirit when she told that it probably wasn't a good idea. I don't know what I'd do right now if I had a car. I'm already stressing about selling my contract. Imagine trying to sell a car.
Anyways. So the Jazz game.
Ash and I headed down there right after I got home from work on Saturday. My mom told us we should ride the tracks so that we didn't have to find parking. We got to the tracks station and had NOOOO idea what we were doing. Like seriously. No idea. This guy could even tell, he told us what bus to get on. We got on that bus. But- he must have been confused because it was going South. Good thing the Lady told us. Hahaha we even talked about what we would have done if it started going the wrong way. Not a good idea.
So then we decided to get on the next one. We were still freaking out, thinking it was the wrong one again. Finally the announcer dude said that it was going to SLC and we took a big sigh of relief.
I thought I was going to die. Believe it or not I have never even rode the tracks (is that correct grammar??? Who knows). Actually, it probably is obvious because of all of the dumb things I just told you. Anyways. We met two missionaries. They were so cool. To me, missionaries seem like celebrities. And they always have. But even more so now! I talked to him the whole ride. He told me about how when he got his call to Salt Lake he was a little disappointed. He's been out 5 months and he says that it really is the best mission. I told him everyone says that. But he convinced me that it really is the best one. I totally believe him. Their goal is to baptize at least one person A WEEK. That is crazy! And they usually meet that goal! I know that Salt Lake is the most successful mission. But I didn't know it was THAT successful! They were actually on their way to take a family that they were going to baptize this upcoming week to temple square. We talked about everything. I even asked him for advice. He told me that I needed to read the Book of Mormon at least 3 times. I'm almost done with my fourth time. Then he said to start reading Preach my Gospel, which I have started doing as well, and said to read Chapter 3 over and over again. It was so much fun talking to them and I also talked to this other guy for a while and this other couple. I can't wait to just be able to talk to people about the Gospel all the time!

Row 3. 

Ya. We made it on the tracks. We think... 

At the game :)

So we finally got to the Jazz game. We had so much fun! We were a little late because of our track issues, but we still made it. We had really high nose bleed sections. My mom was on the third row. Like THEE third row. One of her friends won tickets from his work. They were worth 660$. It was insane. We went down there at the fourth quarter because they had some seats. We couldn't keep our mouths closed. It was amazing. WE COULD SMELL THE PLAYERS! We were in awe. It was so close. And so real. I can't even explain. I didn't realize how much I missed basketball. But ya. We had such a good time. I love spending time with my sister :)

Tuesday.

Tuesday. 

Whew. 

I THINK I can wait till then. But then I still have at least 3 weeks to wait for my call. Probably longer than that. 

I can't explain how excited I am to go. I have been studying Preach my Gospel, and I just love it! I can't get enough. It just makes me love the gospel and this work so much more than I already did. It makes me realize just how simple the gospel is, but how extremely important it is to do those small and simple things. It may seem like repetition, but it invites the spirit. And by inviting and letting the spirit teach us we will learn new things about our Savior, Heavenly Father, and the gospel that we didn't know before, or maybe that we had forgotten. Our testimonies are either growing or dying. They do not stay the same. We need to be looking for way and praying for ways and opportunities to increase our own personal testimonies. Prayer, Scripture Study, and attending church are just a few of the simple things we can do to help our testimonies grow. I can't wait to share the sweet special gift of the gospel to my brothers and sisters, wherever they may be, and bring them back to the light through the spirit and the my Savior, and Father in Heaven. :) 

Patience... Patience... PATIENCE!!!

OK. I cannot take it anymore! I just want to have my call! Ya.... sure... my papers aren't even in yet, but it's hard being patient for my doctors appointment (Wednesday) my dentist appointment (Wednesday) and meeting with my Stake President (still to be determined). My bishop told me to get my papers in as soon as I can. Just so I can try and beat the huge wave. I got everything filled out the night I met with him. I scheduled the dentist the next day, and I already had the doctors scheduled. The stake president is going to be the death of me. I seriously cannot wait. I have had this impatience disease my whole life. It's a cure. I dunno how I got it. My mom or dad don't have it... when I get married I might actually pass away from it. AHHHHH!! I can't stop thinking about it. Plus I know that even after I get my papers in it will take forever because all of the people putting them in. But the sooner I get them in, the better. I'm trying to stay positive... It's so hard!!! The stake president it out of town next week and I don't think I can wait another week. But he told me to be patient, and I know that I can do it... I just keep praying for Heavenly Father to keep me patient... the sad thing is... it's working. I dunno what I would do if I hadn't prayed for it. I wouldn't be able to handle it. 

Ya this is kind of super pathetic (more than you know actually) that this is my troubles right now. People are out there dying and I'm complaining about waiting for the greatest thing that is going to happen to me in my life. Sorry. That's pretty selfish. I'm just so excited. I've been waiting forever to go on a mission, I should be able to control myself and wait just a little bit longer. 

Thanks for listening. ;) 

The Start :)

It's so funny how everything in my life has changed so quickly. School was my number one priority 5 days ago. I had been working so hard to get my GPA up and trying to figure out what classes I was going to be taking next semester. I was also trying to figure out how I could graduate so I could go on my mission as soon as I could but finish school before I left. Boys were my close second to school. I was looking to date someone seriously, but also just trying to let things happen and let to Lord guide my choices. School and a social life was taking over my life.

But now that I'm going on a mission EVERYTHING has changed.

Now school is kind of on the back burner (not so much that I'm not going to finish or pass) and my mission is all I'm worrying about. Believe it or not boys haven't even entered my mind since Saturday! Actually- I want to just stay away from them so there isn't any chance that I find that "one" and I don't get to go. I just want to scream the gospel to the world! I cannot wait. I just want to leave now. But I know I'm not ready. My bishop gave me some great advice to do while I'm preparing and I just know that he is inspired and called of God. I needed to hear those things. Because I have been slacking just a little bit on my prayers and I needed a way to make them more meaningful and personal. He gave me just the answer, which is actually the first advice. He told me that I needed to ask Heavenly Father to guide my life. Ask him for things specifically. Like asking me to have him help me find those I can teach, or find people to serve. Things like that in my everyday prayers, mornings especially will help.

You know what else I feel really lucky to have. My dad. I feel extremely lucky that I get to have him with me every step of the way on my mission. That is a huge blessing. I love him so much.

But I can already tell Satan is working on me. Well really- he's been after me my whole life, but I can feel it more lately. It really is true what all the missionaries go through. For me, it's just making my testimony stronger. I feel like I can conquer the world. He is angry right now. Especially with everything with politics, new missionaries, new temples. Everything. But that just means that we have more people to conquer him! We can do it. The last days are coming. It may seem scary, but it's coming! It may not be while we are alive, but we are definitely preparing, being prepared, and being prepared to teach our children. I dunno about you, but I can't wait!

Like they say in Hairspray... "You can either fight it, or rock out to it!"

I have to say... I think the LDS church is for sure rocking out to it! :)

Alma 29:9 "Perhaps I may be an instrument in the hands of God to bring some soul to repentance; and this is my joy."