We totally agreed. It was really cool because we were able to share some of our experiences with all of the sisters.
I shared about how when I was in Junior High and all my friends were very supportive of me. I told them I was fasting for my dad on a school day while we was going in for surgery. They all ended up fasting with me and we wore dresses to school and just sat and talked at lunch. It was nice to have good friends who were so willing to help and knew what I was going through so I could talk to them about it.
I think also shared something that has always been very personal to me and I have only recently began to share it.
My dad passed away on Thursday night while we were at girls camp. On Sunday night we got together as a family for family prayer like we did every night. But this time it was completely different.
My dad wasn't talking or even really moving. He was sort of in a coma I guess. So he wasn't in the room when we talked about this. Even if he was, I don't know if he would have understood.
My mom sat us down and told us how bad my dad was getting and that he was going to pass away soon. I remember the words really didn't even register in my brain. I knew that, but I don't really think it ever sank in. I don't really remember any details of the conversation or the prayer we had. But I do remember saying the prayer together and asking Heavenly Father that he could take our dad. We didn't want him to suffer here any longer and we were willing to give him up so he would be happy.
I was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life. I remember just balling and just thinking, "why on earth did we just do that? Now he's going to take him."
As I look back on that experience I realized that I learned 2 things.
It is always Heavenly Fathers will. Just because you pray and ask for a new x-box does not mean you are going to get it. It is still up to our Father in Heaven what is going to happen. We couldn't just sit down and beg and plead with Heavenly Father to heal our dad. We just knew that wasn't going to happen. I'm not saying that prayers do not get answered at all. I'm actually saying the exact opposite. Heavenly Father hears, and answers every single one of our prayers, no matter what. That does not mean we are going to get what we want, we will get what is best for us in the long run, and I know that for a fact. Of course I didn't want my dad to leave us for a short time, but it was necessary in the great scheme of things and I can partially see that now. I don't know where I would be in my life right now without this trial.
But I learned another thing. We need to adjust our lives and prayers so that we can get to a point where out will, is the same as our fathers will. Once we learn to accept his will and make it our own, our lives will go so much smoother. I learned that. I know that isn't an easy statement to make, it's hard when you see a loved one suffering and all you want to do is take that pain away. But we need to remember that our will, needs to be the same as our Father in Heavens. It will make our trials sometimes be a little more understandable, and will help us to see further down the road.
Sorry if that totally was jumbled and sounded like a crazy person talking. But that was basically what I shared with the sisters. At least along that line. Ha they were all crying. But hey, that's what you do in Relief Society, and that's what happens when the person talking is balling and you can hardly hear anything.
Overall the lesson my aunt gave was very spiritual and helped me in more ways than one. The spirit was extremely strong and I will never forget that.
Ashley also shared an experience where she was fasting for my dad in school and all of the sudden in the middle of class she got really hungry. She learned later that that was the time that my dad got out of surgery. I thought that was pretty cool.
My mom also brought the spirit when she told a story of me as a little kid. I'm not going to write about it cuz I know I'll just mess it up. You'll have to ask her about it later.
My grandma was there as well so me my grandma and my aunt Debra went to her house for dinner (my uncle was gone so it was just us girls). She mad us such a yummy dinner and we even slurped jello, even though my grandma was appalled (she's the kind of grandma that has to show us how to cut cake properly and how to set the table every time we eat with her. Man we love her ;)).
Then we got to go and see my cousins new beautiful house! It was so much fun to sit and chat with them!
I fell like my life is amazing right now and going just the way I want it (at least, that's what I keep telling myself).
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